


Mint to Be

by kainess



Series: MC isn't good at pick up lines. [15]
Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Beelzebub - Freeform, F/M, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, M/M, MC is gn, all the food puns, alllll the food puns, and so is the text based style, beel - Freeform, mc is back, obey me - Freeform, obey me shall we date - Freeform, shall we date - Freeform, sorry if your name is actually jared lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:27:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28266870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kainess/pseuds/kainess
Summary: Beelzebub comes back for more food-related pick-up lines.
Relationships: Beelzebub (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Reader
Series: MC isn't good at pick up lines. [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1854259
Comments: 17
Kudos: 104





	Mint to Be

**Author's Note:**

> yO sorry i've been gone from this series for so long  
> honestly I've just been working on a ton of one-shots as well as another series (human!mammon and demon!mc) but I'm finally back  
> I haven't forgotten about this precious train wreck of a series lol

**Beelzebub:**

I am not content anymore.

**MC:**

????

did something happen?

wait, are you mad at me?

**Beelzebub:**

What? No. 

But I am no longer content. 

**MC:**

beel, i need you to be more specific

**Beelzebub:**

You’ve been giving my brothers so much attention lately. 

Especially Lucifer.

Why aren’t you giving me anymore pick up lines?

I liked the ones you told me back then.

**MC:**

s-someone likes my pick up lines??

am i dreaming????

**Beelzebub:**

You’re not dreaming.

At least I don’t think you are.

**MC:**

i’m sorry if you’ve felt like i’ve been ignoring you for the others

you should have told me sooner beel :((

i’d never ignore my favorite redhead 

**Beelzebub:**

:) 

**MC:**

ok ok here goes nothing

did it hurt when you fell from the vending machine

**Beelzebub:** **  
** That doesn’t make any sense.

How would I fall from a vending machine?

Like, did I fall out of one??

**MC:**

because you are a snack

**Beelzebub:**

Oh.

That was cute, I liked that one.

**MC:**

that makes me happy beel

**Beelzebub:**

But are you saying you want to eat me?

**MC:**

beel, no

i think you misunderstood

ask asmo what that means later

anyway

are you a banana because i find you a-peeling 

**Beelzebub:**

I like that one a lot.

I like your food pick up lines, even if they’re a little confusing at times.

**MC:**

god you are so wholesome

**Beelzebub:**

I don’t know what he has to do with this, but thank you.

**MC:**

you’re right, my bad

**Beelzebub:**

Another one please.

**MC:**

whew, high demand

good thing i have some on the ready at all times

just in case lucifer ever asks for one

**Beelzebub:**

I don’t know if that’ll ever happen.

**MC:**

it might, you don’t know that

maybe one day he’ll realize how good my pick up lines are

and he’ll come running into my arms

that or diavolo will ask me for some one day

he did like my pick up lines

**Beelzebub:**

That has a higher chance than Lucifer asking.

**MC:**

i’m jared, i’m 19, and i never fucking learned how to read

**Beelzebub:**

Your name isn’t Jared.

And you can read.

And why are you swearing? Are you mad at me?

I’m sorry.

**MC:**

nO WAIT 

I’M NOT MAD I PROMISE

IT WAS A MEME

A JOKE 

NEVERMIND

FORGET I SAID THAT

  
  


**MC:**

uh 

anyway

are you a doughnut 

because i find you 

a-dough-rable 

**Beelzebub:**

I want a donut now.

**MC:**

i’ll get you one later

you make my heart skip a beet

**Beelzebub:**

Lucifer might get mad at that. 

Humans can die if their hearts skip too many beats, right?

**MC:**

no beel

like

a beet

the food

**Beelzebub:**

Oh.

That’s funny.

**MC:**

this worked better in person when i had the actual food on me

**Beelzebub:**

I appreciate it anyway.

I like it.

Just like I like you.

**MC:**

omg beel

pls 

i cannoli have eyes for you

**Beelzebub:**

That’s my favorite one right now.

You have stolen a pizza my heart.

**MC:**

!!!

did you just respond to my pick up line with another pick up line???

**Beelzebub:**

Maybe.

**MC:**

well 

i think we’re mint to be

**Beelzebub:**

You’re so sweet you have my eyes glazed over like donuts. 

**MC:**

you’re spicier than sriracha 

**Beelzebub:**

Perfect response. 

Too bad we cantaloupe. 

**MC:**

if i wrote a cookbook you’d be my favorite recipe 

**Beelzebub:**

Are you from a cafe? Because I like you a latte. 

**MC:**

are you a pizza at a chinese buffet? 

because i want you, but can i trust you?

**Beelzebub:**

I’ll eat any pizza at any place.

Unless Solomon or Mammon made it. 

**MC:**

i should have expected that answer.

**Beelzebub:**

I think we’d grow a great organic garden together.

**MC:**

i think we’re engaged now, beel

that one is very domestic 

**Beelzebub:**

I mean, I’m not against it.

**MC:**

brb telling lucifer i’m engaged now

**Beelzebub:**

No, wait. 

**MC:**

i lied

i don’t actually want you dead

anyway 

call me an ambulance 

because you just

**Beelzebub:**

You’re an ambulance?

**MC:**

i think here is a good place to stop for the day

**Author's Note:**

> !! i'm still taking friends on obey me  
> if you'd like, my game ID is 1390683109  
> I'm adding anyone back :)) my icon is of lovely son luke, and my message is "human squad gang gang" bc hi I might as well be mc lol


End file.
